Just now, ex student (2004 sec 4), let's call him J, smsed me for a loan of $600 for school fees and claimed that he will return it in 2 weeks time. This is not the first time he asked me for a loan. And so far, I did not lend him any.
Later he sent another sms stating that he hopes that on account that he is my former student, I will be willing to help him out this time round. I replied with quite a long sms and this is my opening message,"Precisely you are my former student that I hope our relationship will not become that of a creditor and debtor... ..."
I remembered when I left the school, some of them (including J) treated me to Seoul Gardens in Taka and one boy secretly told me that J always borrows money. It was then that I found out about his habit of borrowing money.
Looking at the surface, it seems that the debtor usually is in the awkward position as he has to ask people for money, but in actual fact, the person being approached by the debtor is in a more awkward and delicate position. Refusing to help can makes one seem cruel and a villian. We often find it difficult to reject a loan if the person is a close relative or friend, not to mention an ex student. Ultimately, it is up to the individuals to decide whether he wants to be a villian or a samaritarian. If he chooses the latter, he has to be prepared of not getting a cent back. As for those who managed to get a loan, must really make an effort to repay back. Else over time, people will lose trust and faith in you.
Most of us have had our share of loan from friends or to friends. And because of the loan (whether you are the creditor or debtor), the relationship friends/relatives shared initially started to change. It is really not healthy and if borrowing becomes habitual, bankruptcy is only a matter of time.
Seeing J borrowing money even when he was only in Secondary School, I couldn't help but feel a pinch in my heart. While parents provide shelter and educate our kids, it is also very important for parents to inculcate theimportance and correct financial values in their kids, as well as setting an example themselves. The 9 pm TV serial on Channel 8 shows this couple (acted by Patricia Mok) who did not make an effort to work and even taught their kids (in the show) to lie (to get money and sympathy), yet making their actions justifiable by exploiting the power of the media! Terrible, isn't it?
My leader in faith once told me that if the parent(s) is a habitual debtor, chances are, their kids will also be one, just like a heredity disease. How scary!! This financial karma must break!!
Hence, if we don't want our kids to become a habitual debtor who will be despised and loathed by others, we as parents, should do something about it. Educating our kids about the importance of financial management is also part of parenting and should begin at a young age.
